About

The Onion has been publishing satirical news since 1988. This project collects their headlines by calendar date, so you can see what absurdities were manufactured on any given day across three decades. The earliest headline is from 1993.

The patterns are part of the fun. Area Man shows up reliably. The Nation reacts predictably. Local teens remain confounding. Headlines from 1998 feel like they were written yesterday, which is either funny or depressing.

Some caveats...

This archive is pulled from The Onion's news, politics, local and latest sections and therefore incomplete. Some categories — such as American Voices, horoscopes, editorial cartoons and video content — are excluded on purpose. In addition, only dated articles appear on the calendar pages.

There's no official API or comprehensive data source, so this represents a best-effort scrape and likely represents most of The Onion's content since the mid-1990s. If your favorite headline is missing, it's probably one of the undated ones. Sorry about that.

This is an unofficial fan project. All headlines link back to their original source at theonion.com.